ABU DHABI. DO.

Abu Dhabi has changed a lot since my last visit in 2009.

"Really, Captain Obvious?", you might ask. But with recent infrastructure developments complete, and more in the works, Abu Dhabi is finally flexing its tourism muscles. The emirate's tourism masterplan - which for so long promised so much - is taking shape, making the city and the emirate's regions a seriously good, anything-but-average stopover option if you're travelling through this neck of the woods.

For years, the jewel in Abu Dhabi's crown was the remarkable Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque - an astonishing expression of faith, a welcoming place of worship and, in 2016, TripAdvisor's second-most popular world landmark behind only Angkor Wat. For many still, it's worth a visit to Abu Dhabi just to spend time here.

GETTING MY DISNEYLAND ON IN HONG KONG

I'm a rational grown-up.

I know marketing. I know when I'm having my emotional buttons cunningly pushed. I know that there are many things from my childhood that have faded out of memory. Things that, if I encountered them now, I'd probably just pass right by.

I also know that I should find the prospect of crowds and queues annoying. Yet somehow the night before a visit to Hong Kong Disneyland I can hardly sleep. I feel a tangle of excitement coiling up, butterflies even. It shouldn't affect me like this. How do they do it?

As a kid, just about the most exciting thing I could imagine was a trip to Disneyland. Occasionally a posh friend might head to California during school holidays, returning with mountains of astonishingly flavoured bubble gum (Grape! What will they think of next?) and mesmerising tales of a day or two at Disneyland. It was too much for this kid.

ON SPLENDOUR. AND WORDSWORTH.

So, Splendour 2016 has been and gone. Tip: Whatever you do, don’t refer to it by its full name: Splendour in the Grass.

It’s Splendour. Just Splendour. Are you Splendouring? Did you Splendour? Verb and proper noun. And an absolute monster of a thing.

I splendoured for the first time this year and I'm still processing it. There are, for sure, bigger festivals out there - bigger crowds, bigger acts and buzz. But this thing takes place in a tucked-away haven of coastal hinterland, invisible from the nearest road. For all you know as you drive north from Byron Bay, the adjacent bush is a tranquil national park inhabited by whip birds and marsupials who graze the grassland under a dappled canopy of Eucaplypts.

But you’d be wrong.

FEEDING THE FAMILY IN SINGAPORE

Food is serious business in Singapore.

There are tiny, hole-in-the-wall kitchens that have operated for eons serving a single specialty dish. Literally one dish.

When Singapore's Changi Airport opened 'Singapore Food Street' in Terminal 3 all hell broke loose after The Straits Times newspaper revealed that seven of the 13 food stalls in the terminal bore no direct links to the famous stalls referenced in their names.

The report stated that, Jalan Tua Kong Minced Pork Noodles at the airport food street is not an offshoot of the famed 132 Meepok in Marine Terrace, which was located in Jalan Tua Kong in the 1990s. It is also not related to Jalan Tua Kong Lau Lim Mee Pok Kway Teow Mee in Bedok Road.

ARRAWARRA BEACH HOUSE

We did scoff a bit when the lady next door proclaimed, “Our son has travelled all over the world, and he says there’s just about nowhere as nice as Arrawarra”, in what seemed to be an in-real-life scene from The Castle. We’d only been in Arrawarra a few hours and, whilst charmed by our gorgeous, rented beach-house, it did seem a bit of a stretch. Sure, it’s a nice spot but we’ve been to plenty of them over the years, many displayed on an enormous world map in the house's living room.

Arrawarra is a bit of a secret spot. You won’t find it on a  world map, no matter how big. From my experience, a typical conversation about the place goes something like this...

ZEN AND THE ART OF THE THEME PARK QUEUE

Universal Studios Singapore.

Theme parks have changed a lot since I was a kid. Much of the change has been around technology, the Disney people doing some incredible end-to-end, near-field, auto-payment, ride-scheduling spookiness, collecting lots of juicy data along the way - a transaction that seems OK to everyone.

But the most visible change for me, is the advent of digital There is a XX minute wait for this ride signage. Having recently spent a day at the very excellent Universal Studios Singapore I can attest to their accuracy. The suggested 60-minute wait for the Jurassic Park Rapids Adventure was absolutely bang-on. Even with the straight-to-the-front-of-the-line VIP ticket holders regularly slipping past us, we awaited an hour virtually to the second.

PONDERING LUGGAGE

The advent of the wheely bag totally revolutionised luggage. No more back-breaking, awkward hauling and dragging of large rectangular suitcases. Those little wheels changed everything. Telescopic handle - click, click, click - lean forward and away you go silently on those glassy-smooth airport floors. 

That big, heavy bag is no longer the ungainly beast that it once was. It's even acceptable for a fair-sized piece of carry-on to be wheel-enabled getting you right to the aircraft door leaving you only having to pick it up for the final few steps to your seat and the overhead bin.

But what about luggage that's smaller than that? Are wheels acceptable on a briefcase, for example? I've seen things that look like wallets-on-wheels being confidently escorted by men in suits apparently unaware of the shame they're bringing to their kind. Just pick the thing up, for crying out loud. 

THREE SIGNS YOU'VE BOOKED THE WRONG HOTEL

I don't know about you, but I think there are some absolute tell-tale signs that you've booked the wrong hotel. 

Travelling for business recently I encountered a number of capital-city hotels. All mid-range (no sense of entitlement here), well-located, looked good on the interwebs and, accordingly, seemed to offer incredible value. Some of the hotels delivered in spades. One or two did not, and I could tell within seconds at the check-in desk that I was about to be slapped with the disappointment stick.

One, in particular, offered a perfect storm of signs that I'd booked the wrong hotel.

1. On Arrival: The highlighting of some unnervingly strict Ts & Cs on the arrival paperwork, accompanied by the following warnings: Sir, please note that if you damage the room, or if it requires excessive cleaning you will be charged $XX. And, Sir, please note that check-out is strictly 10.00am. Your credit card will be charged $XX for every 20 minutes after 10.00.

Side note: I stayed in a hotel in Bali once that even had a charge for getting tattoo ink on the bed sheets. 

That kind of thing. Alarm bells even going in.

FINDING TIME IN THE COOK ISLANDS

People often talk about 'island time'. Usually as a way of excusing slow service or a late departure or even the complete non-delivery of an expected holiday amenity. Typically imparted with a hearty laugh and a beaming smile, island time is either utterly charming or infuriating depending on the type of person you are. If you're a stickler for detail and precision, and expect slick, deferential interactions from robotic staff, then maybe the Pacific isn't for you.

Of course many tourism operations in the Pacific now deliver precision in spades but fortunately (for mine) island time still sets the tone and pace of life in many corners of this delicious part of the world. 


Time in the Pacific is a bit of a rubbery thing. It seems to sloooow down, and there's the international dateline to deal with (lose a day here, gain one there, arrive before you depart), it's madness. 


Kia Orana - Welcome to the Cook Islands.

TRAVEL AND THE FOMO OF FOOD

There are apps for everything, it seems, and they have revolutionised the traveller's experience of navigating new places. A hat-tip to Google Maps for basic navigation. You are here. Whilst, platforms like Foursquare have added social functionality so we can all now see where you are, what you did and what you thought of it. And with food playing such a big role now in our travel experiences, the fear of missing out (FOMO) sees us reaching for our devices, looking for the answer to just about the most important question of all: What's good to eat nearby?

Travel and food. Food and travel. pretty inseparable, aren't they? Gastro-Tourism. Paris, Florence, New York, Melbourne, The Barossa, Bangalow (indulge me) all places with supreme culinary credentials. But once you're there, how do you know what's around you, and what's worth sampling? You can follow your nose (my favourite), do it old-school with a printed guide book (with luck the highly-rated dumpling place might still be operating), put a call-out to your social networks, or make the most of your phone's geolocation by tapping into an app.